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Homosexuality in the Arab world could be a topic so volatile that in some countries death is the penalty. nevertheless gradually and very cautiously gay Arabs are starting of the closet with increasing confidence. Spanning across 22 countries with a combined population of 323 million, the Arab world is not only connected through its language but is also linked through varied gay Arab websites, chat rooms, and blogs.

However, for gay Arab Americans, even if they live with a lot of bigger personal freedoms they usually still find themselves conflicted between their sexual, religious, ethnic/cultural and national identities. Meet Issam Khoury of Washington, DC and Ramy Eletreby of la. They both are gay Arab men but every with a completely different path and background. however each men have a remarkable clarity and an agreement on the crucial issues that impact them the most.

Issam Khoury

A refugee by birth and by war, Issam Khoury has seen and experienced a broad cross-section of the globe. both of his oldsters were born and raised in Palestine but owing to the politics surrounding the Israeli occupation, Issam was forced to be born and raised in Kuwait till the age of 13. "I learned what it meant to show a discrepancy in being in Kuwait as a result of as a non Kuwait you are invariably perceived different" he explains.

But when Iraq invaded Kuwait in 1990, Issam's family was forced to live in Cypress where Issam finished his schooling. again he felt the unspoken words and perception of being different in another country.

As a youth Issam began to become more awake to his burgeoning homosexuality. "I always knew i was interested in men. I knew from the days once I was living in Kuwait which to me debunks the myth that a lot of Arabs would really like to possess that this does not exist in our part of the world as a result of it does. when I moved to Cypress in 95' I found myself turning into sexually active and that is how I knew that this was here to stay" he reveals.

Issam later attended faculty in the US, 1st graduating from Virginia Tech, then onward to Ohio State to earn a masters degree and then forward to yank University where he's currently earning a doctorate in cultural studies.

He admits that it wasn't till college that he began to become fully attentive to his identity as an "outwardly gay man and not someone who engages in sex with other men" he explains. In some ways his college years helped him to adopt a holistic identity that was related to his sexual orientation, but this was solely the primary step.

He reveals that his journey still was "very troublesome as a result of I actually have no examples i do not have any James Baldwin's we do not have any Gloria Anzaldua's, we don't have any of those in the Arab community. There are gay people out there and they're out and they are proud, however they do not write, they do not represent, they need not laid the inspiration for a community within the same way that american ethnic communities have had on varying levels."

As a result, Issam found nurturing support among the African american community adding that he was "adopted" by several black folks which "in the black community...I found my identity as a person of color.

I really found my identity as a gay man of color through reading E. Lynn Harris. I found it inspiring to examine men of color loving other men and color. I found my identity and what it might be to be in a very relationship with another man of color and how beautiful that might be and how celebrated that could be while not having to be ashamed of it."

In terms of his Arab identity, Issam says that he found his Arabic-self through his masters degree program at Ohio State where he studied Arab literature. He overtly admits that he had a "big aversion" to white people after being called a "sand nigger, camel jockey, and towel head" during his school years. so this new educational program gave him each affirmation and confirmation of who he really was, thus casting away all labels and stereotypes.

"It was in my masters program that I found myself as an Arab man" he proudly states. However, the reconciliation of being Arab, Gay and Christian was still a long, arduous and complicated method. after kicking off to his oldsters, he we went back into the closet for 6 years.

"It took lots of internal work on behalf of me to merge my Arabic and my gay identities. It took a lot of soul looking, it took a lot of research; delving into the issue of Arabic and gay however it's very slow. we have a lot problems with pride in Arabic community and pride is said to family honor and if somebody is gay then you shame family honor and thus these problems aren't widely talked concerning however discussed in closed circles" he shares.

Because of his journey of transformation and reconciliation Issam decided to enroll in a cultural studies doctoral program because he recognized that he belonged to too several numerous teams to limit himself to only one identity or concentration. "The united states thrives on identity politics; it is the capital of what I decision the check box on the appliance because you usually need to be one thing you usually need to be categorized as one thing."

Further, Issam's own diversity and his want to be told about the variety of others led him out of his personal check box. he is a member of a black fraternity and is currently learning to speak Spanish, all in an endeavor to broaden his exposure and understanding of culture and diversity.

Ramy Eletreby

Born and raised in sunny Southern California behind the conservative and affluent curtain of Orange County, Ramy Eletreby, who is of Egyptian descent, grew up the youngest of 3 children. whereas each of his oldsters were born and raised in Egypt, Ramy's perspective features a distinct american flair. He says that he was raised "conservative and Muslim" and that his upbringing has helped shaped him to where he's nowadays.

Ramy's gay awakening [www.ChatArabs.com chat for arabs] really began round the age of fifteen. He remembers attending a play in los angeles that centered around boxing. during a locker space scene, one of the boxers truly showered on stage. it was Ramy's 1st time seeing a unadorned man.

"I was flustered and blushing and all that stuff and that i just knew that if I had a reaction like that it must mean one thing. I never had such a strong reaction of anybody like that. I could not avert my eyes however deep down I knew I should not be enjoying it."

Interestingly enough, Ramy didn't act out sexually on his urges. Instead he went through a private journey seeking to reconcile his sexuality with his Muslim beliefs. "I went through plenty of self exploration, lots questions, and a lot of confusion" he explains.

Similar to the path of many other gays, Ramy eventually mustered up enough courage to start out starting up to his friends. once an eight year period he had start off to simply regarding everybody in his life with the exception of his circle of relatives, but that was getting ready to modification in a terribly very public approach within the summer of 2005.

A budding actor,[www.ChatArabs.com Arab chat] Ramy decided to accept a job at a Hollywood theater portraying a gay Arab. however bound Arab community teams recognized of the play and its gay content and began to protest. Meanwhile the LA Times bloodhounds sniffed out the story and surrounded down playhouse to do what eventually became a major news story regarding the play, its gay content, the controversy, and therefore the incontrovertible fact that its lead actor, Ramy was a gay man.

When the story hit, Ramy estimates it took four people reading it before the news was promptly delivered to his folks. additional attention came when Advocate Magazine conjointly did a spread on him. it absolutely was an extremely stressful and an emotionally raw time for him, however nowadays he is out to everyone and living his life authentically.

And after a few years of wrestling with each his spirituality and his sexuality, Ramy has finally found the peace that he's been checking out since he was fifteen. "I've just come to the conclusion that not everything is ideal. This religion that i used to be raised in is not perfect" he explains. He adds that people who subscribe to a religious belief system must "apply however abundant you can apply to your life and since i do know I cannot amendment certain facts about who i am....if i choose to have a faith like Islam it has to be as much as I will take of it."

Today Ramy works for a gay publication in l. a. where he says it has helped him to search out his gay identity. However, he sees no back and forth competing of his multiple identities of being gay, Arab, and Muslim. "I've never allowed it to be a fight; it's just a part of my daily reality. i'm an Arab american who happens to be raised Muslim who considers himself for the most half Muslim but i am an yank who is of Arab descent."

He adds that "your [www.ChatArabs.com Arabic chat] identity is who you're at any given moment. there is never a day where i'm not Muslim or don't not read myself as a product of Muslims. i am able to undergo every day and realize which parts of my establish are speaking up and the way I can filter those to return to a centered stop method through any given scenario."

Advice to Young Gay Arabs

While Issam and Ramy were able to move above and beyond the conflicts of their multiple identities, there are many other young gay Arabs who are still baffled by it and struggle with it daily.

Issam gives this piece of recommendation to gay Arab youth. "You aren't alone, you are not the only gay Arab person out there. you're not the only young man or young woman who's fighting this. realize where the parable is; notice the very fact and where the 2 separate. Do your analysis. Dispel the myths for yourself."

Ramy agrees adding that "the solely person that you actually got to hear is yourself. you can not allow people that have taught you as a toddler, or your folks, or family members, non secular students, siblings, friends. you can't permit folks to make selections regarding your life and what is right concerning you without you involved. thus don't act outside of your best interest."